ABOUT BILLIE
A little about Billie.
Billie is an indoor cat and our self-appointed Head of Gravity Testing. If something is sitting peacefully on a high surface, she considers that an unresolved issue.
Billie is a real cat with an honorary job title and absolutely no billable hours. She is part of life behind Herr Systems, not the person handling your project. Please direct all actual questions, approvals, and requests for opposable thumbs to Emily.
As an indoor cat, Billie keeps her operations close to home. Her particular area of interest is knocking things off high places—a field in which the research is apparently never finished. An object on a shelf is not a finished arrangement. It is a proposal.
Her working philosophy is simple: if it moves, investigate. If it does not move, try a paw. If it falls, the experiment was successful. Cleanup belongs to a different department.
How I work
Find the highest available surface
Get a good overview of the situation. Identify anything that appears too comfortable remaining where it was put.
Apply one paw
Start with a gentle nudge. Escalate until gravity takes ownership of the deliverable.
Decline the retrospective
Observe the result, make brief eye contact, and leave the human to document the incident.
What I bring to a project
Continuous gravity assurance
A rigorous, entirely unsolicited testing program for objects stored above floor level. Previous results do not eliminate the need to test again.
A healthier relationship with work
A reminder that not everything needs to be a meeting, a metric, or even productive. Sometimes the correct next step is a nap.
Beyond the brief
Indoor living, high places, naps, and relocating things from those high places. Outdoor expeditions are not part of her job description. Neither is picking anything back up.
Good projects start with a conversation.
Tell us what you’re trying to make easier. We’ll work out the scope and who can help.